Impossible is nothing - part II

Taking off from where we left, let's focus on some more aspects of cinema like parking the car/bike. Well anyone going anywhere always gets to park his or her car right in front of the gate/door. No, I mean no cop (read pandu) or security guy (read chaukidar) has a problem. No parking hassles at all! Well the security guy even gives a wide smile & opens the door if it happens to be a restaurant! It never happened to me nor do I remember this happening to anyone that I know! Common, every city has a parking problem can't we be pragmatic.

Ok, now that we started with cars, how is it that a on the dole guy has a car that a well-to-do guy can barely afford. He dines in the best restaurants, has a beautiful damsel too!! Shouldn't this be more realistic like the guy eats & doesn't have money to pay & gets booted out/ beaten up/thrown behind bars/girl smashes him in front of the crowd? Sort of like it that way won't you?

Oh! The thriller ghost stories are one of my favorites. The bad guys are always ghosts (evil spirits as some would like to call them). They are always shooed off with light & are afraid of cats? When they can scare the hell out of a man! What the hell is this? & If you show them symbol of god they scram/yell out in pain. I never knew evil was god fearing! Good god! How many movies have we seen that the ghosts are pictured as gruesome creatures? Can't they be made a bit more bearable per-say Cindy Crawford? I won't mind being eaten!

It's know fact that ghosts/evil spirits can't be stopped by bullets then why the hell should you waste time trying to kill a dead one? Oh! I almost forgot mentioning the point that they are hell scared of water. If the dead were living why won't they get thirsty? Or is it only blood thirsty that they get? Probably they believe in the motto drink blood save water & beer.

One very interesting thing especially for guys; whenever something creepy (should I say scary) thing happens, it is always the most beautiful lady who comes to investigate in the middle of the night. Now what is so interesting for guys? Don’t be naïve; she is in the most revealing dress possible. Can’t blame the ghosts here. Everyone will be attracted to such a brave beauty!

Television (TV) & cinema, aha! Can't beat this I bet. Whenever anyone switches on TV in a movie, the newsreader has no other news in the world but to read out the news always concerning that very person. Even worse they give out a clue to a cop suspended for not being able to solve a case. During the crucial investigation this important piece of evidence was missed. Bingo! the news is true. Case solved. Cop gets back his job. Journalism at it’s best. Now I wonder why do we need a cop in the first place? We can have journalist cum cop. You see two in one effect!

Just continuing with the cop effect. How is it that, a simple revolver/shot gun has endless no. of bullets? I was under the impression that it can hold a certain no. only. Yes one more point here, the ammo is always kept in the most inaccessible part of the house like near next to main door. Where the bad guys are standing & waiting for the hero to get out of bed & try to hide. Can’t they be more sensible? Come, kill & get out. Probably it is payback time.

With guns and revolvers is another point that can be related to. Injuries due to battle with bad guys; enter emotional part of hero. After a bloody battle & killing all the bad guys, the hero is just seriously injured. Worse, if the good damsel is killed the hero starts crying like a baby. Now if the lady is not killed, she always has first aid (rather crude aid) to the injuries. Now the hero who never winced while being injured breaks down. Oh Lord! What all a lady can do! Bond movies: bad guys can’t injure him. Now don’t tell me Arnold never breaks down in his movies. I am talking about human movies here. Get it?

If I go on, I may even beat J.K. Rowling. But, that’s not my forte. So, lets stop here. I just watch movies to relive some of my dreams & fantasies; some times to kill time, others just for the fun of it. If all movies were focusing on reality then what would you look forward to? A balanced life should have everything fantasies, dreams, fun & reality. Life without any one of them is hard to imagine.